Maybe you need to be BOSSED AROUND: Told what to do, when to do it, how long to do it, Huh boy? Maybe you really do need to be trained -- Steady and regular, over and over, hard and fast -- till you get it right.

GymBoss Interval Timer

Imposing Discipline You Lack

Well, who needs a burly, well-built stallion barking orders at your sorry, lame, pansy-ass like a tough Marine Drill Sargeant with a cigar stuffed in his muzzle and a dirty, rough-treaded leather boot pinning you down -- when you can be gently coaxed into doing it digitally with all the sheer force and brute dominating power it's batteries can muster. Now DROP AND GIVE ME TWO!... minutes of whatever you can muster. And then another two, if you're man enough. Rinse, Lather, Repeat yourself into a grueling sweat - with a GymBoss.

Beef Tags: interval training, 10 Minute Fitness, timed exercise

They say a picture is worth a THOUSAND words. And that RESULTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES. Well, as you can see below using my revolutionary POSTURE PERFECT ERECTION PERFECTION METHOD...

I transformed myself from a drooping, flaccid, pathetically limp status to full, erect hardness in seconds.



With my revised 10-Second "ERECTION PERFECTION Workout Routine -- Even YOU can achieve results like this without grueling workouts and heavy weights. If you would like tho share the results of YOUR own 'Posture Perfect Erection Perfection' success leave a comment and we'll make arrangements to share YOUR Before-And-After erection pics for all the world to see.

Well that didn’t take long: 14 days into BeefPie’s Back-In-California Fit-Camp Boot-Camp Rehab - B.P.’s physiology threw a tantrum. 10-minute swims morning noon and night, 10-minute each bike, elliptical, treadmill triathalon aerobic workouts, 1 hour “Coreture” (Core Torture) classes - oh and the odd moments of resuming weight-training all hit a crescendo of groaning and whining, leg cramps, and neurological jitters - all symptoms of Classic Over-Training. A day of uh, re-evaluation seems in order. I need salty, buttered noodles and a long, long nap.

Beef Tags: sore muscles, joint ache, sleep-loss

OH CRAP!!! OK, I’ll be honest: BeefPieBear’s first 30-day round of Fabulous Fitness Workout-Routines using the 10 Minute Muscle-Miracle(tm) work-outs just didn’t quite totally, utterly, completely, transform me into a big, giant, massive slab of BEEFY MAN-I-MAL.

OH GAWD!!! PALM SPRINGS GAY PRIDE WEEKEND is EXACTLY 30-Days away and not only do I have to get GORGEOUS F.A.S.T. -- Schit, I have to get my act together AND pack up my cabin AND drive across country AND get to Palm Springs AND get an apartment AND....

Get. My. Ass. Back. To. The. Gym.

Beef Tags: palm springs pride, Gay pride, pride festival

Who needs a tough, cigar-chewing Marine Drill-Sargeant barking orders at your pansy-ass? Well, we all do. But until we find one -- Set your SPORTS TIMER to 10 big-muscle minutes - and simply do ten-minutes of fitness maneouvers with hell-bent FOCUS. It doesn’t matter what: Stretch-It, Crunch-It, Walk-It, Lift-It, Pose-It! All it takes is 10 MINUTE FITNESS, several times a day.

Ok, in Season 2 of Eye On Beefpie - BP starts walking the talk and the Muscle Makeover Challenge begins! So in the first 3 episodes, BeefPieBear preps and SHAVES that gnarly muzzle of his, strips down to the bear essentials, and starts packing on the Meaty-Bones.

Tipping the BATHROOM SCALE at a buck-naked 6’ 220 pounds - BP realizes two things: He has too much fat - and not enough muscle. And that a BODY FAT TESTER would have some rather harsh realities to tell him, and that a BODY TAPE MEASURE would probably agree.

At this point, I’ll trade Five for Five and set a realistic goal: Trade 5 pounds (or more) of body-fat for 5 big burly beefy pound-your-head-in tough raw meaty muscle gain -- before I return to California.

Beef Tags: hairy gut, back hair, sweat, armpits, biceps, deltiod

Life-time fitness starts - or RE-starts for me anyways - with 10 - 3x5 index-cards and a Sharpie. 10 goals that aren’t just vauge notions. Ten realistic, actionable goals with time-frames clearly stated: “I will take timer with me and before breakfast, I will start each morning with a 20 minute walk.” Oh crap! I just wanna drink coffee and smoke cigarettes and check my e-mail before having a greasy, salty breakfast! This old dog needs some new tricks...

Beef Tags: diet, fitness